Movie Review: SPIDER-MAN 3 Author: Bill Ramey Saturday, April, 2007, 12:00 AM TEXAS TIME U.S. Release Date: May 5, 2007 Distributor: Sony Pictures Director: Sam Raimi Writing Credits: Sam Raimi, Ivan Raimi, Alvin Sargent Cast: Tobey Maquire, Kirsten Dunst James Franco, et al. Genre: Comic Book Adaptation, Super Hero MPAA Rating: PG-13 OFFICIAL WEBSITE: www.sony.com TRAILERS: www.apple.com/trailers © 2007 William E. Ramey. All rights reserved. Here’s a shocker: I’m a “DC Guy.” If you are a regular reader of mine, you already know this and are probably thinking “I already know this dude; your site is called ‘Batman On Film' for cripes' sakes!” But my opening statement isn’t for you BOF‘ers, it’s just a disclaimer for those who may stumble upon this review. A "DC Guy" is one that prefers Batman, Superman, The Dark Knight, Wonder Woman (Meh!), The Caped Crusader, and The Batman; as opposed to Spider-Man, The Hulk, and The X-Men. I'll do my part as a "DC Guy" to pimp my 'dawgs: Two of the greatest super hero films of all time are based on DC characters: SUPERMAN: THE MOVIE and BATMAN BEGINS. Plus, I just like saying “I’m a ‘DC Guy.'” Anyway, I’m here today to review Marvel’s 4,259th live-action film in the last year, SPIDER-MAN 3 (Are any of these films released by the same studio?). I’ll offer up this other disclaimer as well: I loved the previous two SPIDER-MAN films. In fact, I gave 2 high marks three years ago when I reviewed it, and I believe I ranked the previous two Spidey-flicks among the best super hero films ever produced. Hell, it’s not like I’m in the minority here as most pundits of the genre are of the same opinion. Needless to say, SPIDER-MAN 3 is not only one of the most anticipated movies of the year, but will be one of the most scrutinized as well. I won’t waste a lot of your time here, as most of y’all know what they’re offering us this time around. We’ve got three villains: Green Goblin 2/New Goblin/Whatever He’s Called/Harry Osborne (James Franco); Flint Marko/The Sandman (Thomas Haden Church); and of course, Eddie Brock/Venom (Topher Grace). Sound crowded? You bet, and unfortunately it is. More on that in a short bit. The other part of the storyline gives us the things-are-going-very-well-for-him Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire). Dude is kicking ass in college, has the hot girl (Kirsten Dunst’s Mary Jane Parker), and New York now L-O-V-E-S Spider-Man! Let me tell you from a guy’s POV what he does when things are going really good -- he gets a tad cocky. And predictably, that’s exactly what happens to our hero this time around. So what did I think about SPIDER-MAN 3? I liked it. I wouldn’t say a lot, but it was "OK+" and I didn’t feel as if I had wasted 2 ½ hours of my life after watching it. I will say of the three films in this series, 3 ranks #3 on my list. But hell, when the other two are so damn good, it’s a hard act to follow with each subsequent sequel. So what’s wrong with it you ask? Well, it falls into the “too many villains” trap (see BATMAN RETRUNS, FOREVER, AND ROBIN for a case study of this phenomena). Look, you can have multiple villains in a superhero film and have it not seem congested (see BATMAN BEGINS as an example), but that’s not the case here. There was no need for Sandman. His character was underdeveloped and you couldn’t care less about him. Now, director Sam Raimi (same last name as moi, different spelling) wants you to, ala Dr. Otto Octavious in 2, but they never provide us with the opportunity to do so. All we know is that Flint Marko’s daughter is dying and that he’s a petty thief. It’s implied that his criminal ways are a result of obtaining cash to save his daughter, but it’s just that, implied. To be honest, Sandman sucks as a villain. A shape-shifter made of sand = cheesy IMO (and people bitch about Mr. Nolan's "realistc" approach with his BATMAN films?). Now they give him an origin, but it doesn’t make sense and is way too much “OK y’all, this is how he becomes The Sandman, got it? Now accept it and lets go.” I got the reason that the character was included, as he plays a role in Peter’s redemption. However, if it were up to me, I wouldn’t have had The Sandman in the film and found another way to provide said “redemption angle.” OK, on to Venom. Done well, in my opinion, but why didn’t he have that big-ass tongue hanging out? OK, that’s petty, because Topher Grace kicks ass as Eddie Brock and Raimi and company provide excellent motivation for Venom’s (although he’s never referred as such, which tells me the Spider-Man fanboys will raise holy hell) hatred of Peter Parker. The only problem with Venom that I can think of is how he got here. It’s not explained other the symbiote was accompanying a meteor that hit the Earth. As far as performances, James Franco (he's really good), Tobey Maguire, and Topher Grace stood out to me. J.K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson stole every scene that he was in yet again. Got to mention Bruce Campbell, making his best cameo appearance yet. Trust me, it’s funny as hell and well done. So you've got to be thinking, what’s the deal with Bryce Dallas Howard? For one thing, her middle name is cool. Also, she’s way hotter than when I last saw her in LADY IN THE WATER. I thought she did a fine job and her Gwen Stacey served exactly the purpose she was there for -- although Spider-Man purists will be up in arms about the character’s portrayal, no doubt. All in all, as someone who is not a “Spider-Man/Marvel Guy,” I found SPIDER-MAN 3 to be a satisfying end to Mr. Raimi’s arachnid cinematic endeavor. Yes, there is a lot of closure here that signals perhaps the end of this chapter of Spidey’s movie adventures. Sony could never produce another SPIDER-MAN film and no one would be left hanging. Speaking of the end, the movie's climax is rather forced and repetitive. Yet again, Mary Jane is in peril and in need of a dramatic rescue by Spidey. Also, the Venom and Sandman team-up is, well, dumb. Two characters that have nothing to do with each other the entire film are all of a sudden partners. What’s up with that?! Also, The Sandman’s “defeat” again shows why this character shouldn’t have been included in this film. With that said, y’all know this ain’t the end for ‘ol Webhead on the big screen! Frankly if is were up to me, I’d bring in a new director and cast and do something different for us to enjoy the next time around. So, did I ever tell y’all I was a “DC Guy?” JETT’S GRADE: B- Bill Ramey, aka "Jett," is the founder and editor-in-chief of BATMAN ON FILM and ON-FILM.NET.