Movie Review: THE BREAK UP Author: Bill Ramey Friday, June 2, 2005 U.S. Release Date: June 2, 2006 Distributor: Universal Director: Peyton Reed Writing Credits: Jeremy Garelick & Jay Lavender Cast: Jennifer Aniston, Vince Vaughn, Joey Lauren Adams, Jason Bateman, Cole Hauser Genre: Romantic Comedy MPAA Rating: PG-13 OFFICIAL WEBSITE: www.thebreakupmovie.net TRAILERS: www.apple.com./trailers © 2006 William E. Ramey and ON-FILM.NET. All rights reserved. I like Jennifer Aniston. I like Vince Vaughn. I like Chicago (The city, not the Cubs -- Hey! I'm an Astros fan! But I do love Wrigley, anyway...). I abhore THE BREAK UP. Let me tell you exactly what happened here. This film really wanted to be a romantic drama with a bit of comedy. When it was all said and done, the studio people, producers, director, whomever, realized that THE BREAK UP sucked and sucked hard. So what do they do, they market it as a funny Vince Vaughn vehicle ala THE WEDDING CRASHERS and OLD SCHOOL. This film was a total let down. Was there anything funny here? Yeah, a few things -- and you’ve already seen them all in the trailers and TV spots. Don’t waste your time going to see it, because you’ve already witnessed the best it has to offer. Here’s the storyline: A dude (Vince Vaughn) and a girl (Jennifer Aniston) hook up at a Cubs game. They shack up in a rather nice condo in Chicago. He’s a beyond stereotypical guy (sports fanatic, beer drinker, plays video games, etc.). She’s an artsy-fartsy art dealer -- sort of on the uppity side (actually she’s Rachel from FRIENDS who now lives in Chicago and does art instead of clothes). So everything is cool until one night Dude doesn’t want to do dishes after dinner and a huge fight ensues. The outcome? They *gasp* breakup! The problem is that neither want to move out of said swanky condo they own together. And now the fun begins! NOT. The guy stuff with the video games, sports, not caring about how the girl feels is so clichéd it made me want to puke. Granted, some of it is true, but it’s so predicable and lame it is hard to take serious. THE BREAK UP is a schizophrenic mess that has no idea what it wants to be. A drama? A comedy? A romantic comedy? It's the "Rachel and Ross on a break" storyline run into the ground. I was so bored after the first half hour, I found myself looking at my watch as much or more than the screen. Since I didn’t care about any of the characters, the only thing I cared about was it coming to an end and getting the hell out of the theater. This movie is an insult to what your girlfriend/wife/mom/mother in law watches on LIFETIME. As for me, I'm going home, fire up the Tivo, and watch every episode of OPRAH my wife has saved. It's got to be better than this. - Bill Ramey JETT’S GRADE: F "Jett" is the founder and editor-in-chief of ON-FILM.NET and BATMAN-ON-FILM.COM.